I have scratched this interview from my mind. She was obviously upset by something or someone, maybe David, maybe someone else but she clearly didn’t mean what she said.
So I am Aware that David and Gillian were allegedly spotted allegedly having dinner in London, with their significant others, who I’m sure had SO MUCH in common and probably loved every moment that they were obligated to make small talk with each other and I’m sure it wasn’t at all awkward for every single person involved.
(Please don’t @ me saying that it’s fake or planted by Russian agents or whatever; I don’t care. All I need is the mental image.)
Anyway, the mental image is as follows: A jetlagged and probably screwdriver-pounding David Duchovny, a hyper-for-does-she-really-need-a-reason Gillian Anderson, the Others, all have finished a civilized dinner and are tucked into a surely chocolatey dessert and David and Gillian have gotten to telling war stories about themselves and, now that the tension that I possibly imagined was between them after the season wrapped has dissipated, and they have for the moment gotten past whatever their respective feelings were re: Gillian choosing not to do more episodes and their divergent perspectives on same: they are like LET’S KEEP THIS GRAVY TRAIN GOING MAN.
How do you keep the gravy train going? CONS. Imaginary David and Gillian are all like, we’re going to kill it at that con in October that we were both recently informed that we were doing! Hey – should we do MORE cons? LET’S DO MORE CONS! Last hurrah! Stack up a few more burlap sacks with cartoon dollar signs on them while we can!
OK, we should do that. NO, NO, WE REALLY SHOULD! *more chocolate is eaten* When can we do a con? What cons are there? Is there one like, next weekend? SOMEONE CALL THEIR ASSISTANT AND HAVE THEM GOOGLE WHAT CONS THERE ARE. Who has their phone? Or, does anyone know how to google? (Monique warily raises her hand) GREAT GREAT, google “comic con july.” Wait no, July is almost over, google “comic con august.” CHICAGO! Let’s do that one!!! Yesssss yes yes let’s do it. SOMEONE FIND CHICAGO COMIC CON’S PHONE NUMBER. Does anyone have a Yellow Pages? …You can find phone numbers on the internet?!? That is so cool. Ok, ok, dialing… HELLO, CHICAGO COMIC CON? THIS IS DAVID DUCHOVNY AND GILLIAN ANDERSON, YOU KNOW, FROM THE X FILES ON TV. Can we do your comic con in August? Yeah, we want to do it. Can we make that happen? Yeah yeah, our agents are on board, whatever. One of us definitely still has an agent. No, this isn’t a prank call! I know we sound overexcited but one of us is very jetlagged and on his 9th screwdriver, which is providing a weird combination of alcohol plus an overabundance of Vitamin C that’s resulting in…this, and the other one is pretty much like this all the time + brownies.
Ok ok, great, cool! Roll out the red carpet for us haha just kidding. No, YES, you can start selling tickets! Fuck yeah! This is gonna be great! Sell those tickets! Ok, sounds good. See you then. Again, this is not a prank call. Bye! *hangs up*
***ACROSS THE OCEAN***
Head of Wizard World (coming back out to where a cookout is in progress in his backyard, because it’s daytime in America due to time differences, looking dazed)
Wife of Head of Wizard World: Who was that, honey?
Sun: (shines merrily)
Birds: (chirp)
Head of Wizard World: (opens beer) I need to write a press release
***BACK IN ENGLAND, UK***
David: And then, the director, Michael Watkins, was like, “He looks like the guy who fucked Mrs. Butterworth.”
Monique (silently mouths words along)
Gillian (cackling) This story is so funny!! Why have you never told it before? You should tell it at COMIC CON
Peter Morgan: Literally even I have heard this
David: Maybe. I don’t want to OVER-prepare.
And then it was 9:30 and everyone (or, 3 out of 4) was tired and they all went to bed, which I don’t need to know anything about thank you, and The Next Day
Just Holding Hands 